Dad's Love: Coping with Pet Loss and Remembering My Sweet Boy Parker

My heart is hurting.

Parker, my long-time furry friend, passed on the evening of Tuesday, April 9th, 2024. He was a 16-year-old Yorkipoo. I had him since he was five weeks old. Parker was a sweet boy, my best friend, and a loyal companion. We were a team. It was love at first sight after Parker flew into Tallahassee from Kansas. (I almost named him Toto because he had a gay dad, but I digress.) He greeted me in his kennel with a big smile, wagging his tail and covered in poop. While he was being potty trained, I used to come home from work to my entire living room rolled with toilet paper. Parker was a handsome little devil. He loved treats, lots of kisses, sticking his head out of the window during car rides, and sniffing everything in sight during our walks. Parker was full of personality.

Parker meets former Florida Lottery Marketing VP Pat Koop at his baby shower graciously hosted by staff.

I doted on Parker like he was my child. I kept up with his doc appointments, saved every record and made sure he was walked, fed healthy foods, watered, groomed and had all the right accessories. He was the first dog I signed up to take full responsibility for, and I didn’t want to get it wrong. However, as years passed, I learned that Parker cared for me as much as I had made it my duty to love and care for him. He was my ride or die through many life changes. Parker stayed by my side, from changing careers to marriage and divorce, returning to school, and even moving cross country during a pandemic. He was my number one champion. Parker taught me unconditional love and affection. He taught me patience. I had to stop and smell the roses when I walked with Parker. He never judged me when I was busy working, occupied with social media, or just wasn’t my best self.

Parker taught me to be present.

Holding Parker and driving frantically through L.A. traffic to make it to the animal hospital while he experienced seizures was devastating. Even though he was in pain, he fought hard and held on quietly through it all as I surrendered him to the nurse in the lobby of the hospital. I initially opted for resuscitation but discovered Parker had other complications with brain swelling, most likely connected to a brain tumor. Parker’s health started to decline last year, as expected with any senior dog. However, he was always resilient and maintained a youthful spirit. The evening prior, on “eclipse day,” I got a hunch that I needed to prepare for Parker’s transition, but I didn’t know when–I thought we had more time before saying goodbye.

I didn’t want Parker to suffer, especially at his senior age, so I chose euthanasia. I had to surrender, knowing I did my best for him, and it was the end. Parker had been my emotional support for 16 years. He deserved to be at peace and pain-free. I told Parker I loved him as he lay on the table wrapped in a blanket. I told him to eat lots of treats, and please check on his dad.

Pet loss sucks. I’ve been feeling heartbroken and crying ever since I lost him. And I have become vulnerable enough to understand that grieving is normal and valid for any special someone. It is necessary for healing. I’m happy my baby boy Parker lived a good whole life. He is no longer in pain. I’m humbled and grateful that I was able to experience Parker’s love and learn what it really means to dedicate your life to being a pet owner. And what it means to deal with pet loss and death.

April 11 is #NationalPetDay. On this day and every day, I will remember the wonderful life I experienced with my sweet boy and guardian angel, Parker. If you have a pet or loved ones, hold them tight. To those who have experienced loss, hold on to the good memories and celebrate the blessings.

Thank you to my friends, family, and everyone who has ever shown love and support for Parker.

#RIPParker (August 7, 2007-April 9, 2024)

Coping with Pet Loss

Here are a few resources about coping with pet loss I found helpful and comforting during the grieving process.

Pet Loss Grief, the Pain Explained | Dr. Sarah Hogan, DVM | TEDx | Temecula

Podcast Interview with Daniel McKinnon | Soul Contracts Between Humans and Animals: 

Help Pets Find Safe Homes and Give Back

The ASPCA (American Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals®), is an organization that helps ensure the rescue and protection of animals across the United States who need help and deserve a home. https://www.aspca.org/